August 15, 2015
REALLY!!! I could not believe my eyes when I got home from work on Thursday I had someone cleaning my spotless house. I know that I have told you in the past that our house has 14 rooms. 7 of those rooms are Mother's and JW's and the other 7 are James' and mine. That does not count the 3rd floor art studio and a full basement.
James could give Howard Hughes some tips on how to keep anything clean. I don't want to say that he has OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) but I am going to say it anyway. When I make toast for us on the weekends I have to apply butter to the butter knife, spread it on the toast, wipe the butter knife off with a napkin and then stick it back in the butter. Did you know that bread crumbs will contaminate the butter. Me either.
He was having the new cleaning lady dust the tops of the floor boards, dust the chandelier over the dining room table, mop the already spotless kitchen and bathroom floors, dust the Indian ruin artifacts that were brought at the casino (wink, wink) AND vacuum the man cave.
Did you know that is you combine enough bleach and water and spray it all over your kitchen surfaces that you can ruin three to four of your spouses work blouses every two to three weeks. Thankfully he does not spray the stainless steel appliances with bleach or I would have bleach spots all over my clothing when I get a drink of water or ice out of the fridge door. I have started to come home from work and go right to my room and put on bleach spotted tees so I did not ruin all my work clothes. I have even resorted to trying to fill in the bleach spots with fabric pens. Not a very good fix but at least I don't have white spots all over the front of a shirt if I want to run down to the corner dairy for a loaf of bread or milk. I'm getting low on work clothes and I can only fit going shopping into my schedule every two or three weeks.
Did you know that is you combine Dawn® dish detergent, white vinegar and water in a spray bottle that you can get almost any stain out of you bathroom fixtures. Not that we had any stains to begin with but after 15 years in this house I am surprised that I still have enamel on my tub. Thank goodness he has not tried to clean the wood floors with that mixture.
Did you know that if you sprinkle ground Saigon Cinnamon all around the perimeter of your house it will prevent ants or any other living creature to cross that line. I am sure the neighbors think that Cinnabon® has opened a store in our back yard and the mall will be built later.
Did you know that drinking a tablespoon of organic, raw, unfiltered, unpasteurized, apple cider vinegar mixed with 8 oz. of water will clean your insides. Me either.
Did you know that if you spray your yard with Listerine® it will keep insects away. Me either.
The one line that Mr. Clean has not crossed is telling Mother how to clean her floor. The first floor apartment and porch belong to Mother and JW. As Mother is now 85 it is true that she has started to slow down. Taking care of JW is a full time job and she is going from 7: a.m. till sometimes 11:p.m. The one thing JW has not wavered from is his love of sweets. Yesterday James and I asked Mother if there was anything that she needed before we went out to dinner with some friends. She said that they were low on snacks. Well, Little Debbies® snack cakes are their go to sweet. We have a discount store about 1 1/2 miles from here so James and I went and got them a freezer door full of cookies. JW may not be talking alot but I stacked up the boxes in front of him and asked him what snack he wanted before we left for dinner. He picked out the chocolate coated marshmallow cookies and was happy as could be. We do have someone to help her clean 2 times a week and I keep it at that. If James was to go in and start cleaning her floor than he's on his own. I did ask her if she wanted our new cleaning lady to come in and clean her apartment and I got a big NO.
The other line is my room. I saw a program last weekend on she sheds (say that 5 times fast) and I immediately told JW that I wanted one. It was the ideal place to meditate and destress. I was told that with the gardens in the back of the house and limited space that I could not have one. I retorted with, "you could build it in the basement." Then I would have 2 safe havens in the house that would be no cleaning zones.
March on all you domestic Gods and Godess'. If living in a house that resembles a clean room is your thing than I am grateful that James lets me exist in my little corner of the house. I only get concerned when the dust bunnies start to over take my space.
As for the new cleaning lady, she is going to have a tough job meeting Mr. Cleans agenda. Good Luck.
Phyllis
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